FOR Ana Gasteyer, opening Oct. 8 in “The Royal Family” means no sleep. She says:
“I have an 18-month-old son and 7-year-old daughter. Balancing it all means really managing nothing gracefully. Like if you’re scheduled to do TV, there’s no time to ready yourself. You just go do it. You take every moment as it comes. Every single minute of your day is accounted for. Hard to come by quality time. I actually get excited when I find 15 minutes for myself.
“I’m normally a nocturnal creature who likes to stay up late. But with two babies, I’m up 6:30 each morning. My husband, who’s in advertising and is better than I, takes the early shift. We live in Brooklyn, and almost our only time together is when we drop the big one off to school. We walk together. Me, no mascara, hair in a ponytail. The baby sitter comes in the afternoon. So will I have more children? I think I’m finished. Listen, I worked through my pregnancy, and being an actress and being pregnant is not easy.”
A child of Washington, DC, she spoke of the Sidwell School, where the Obama kids are enrolled:
“My husband and I both went there. It’s not fancy shmancy. Yes, it’s rooted in the Quaker philosophy, teaches pacifism and equal rights, things I care passionately about, but it’s highly academic, into the classics, challenging, it validates original ideas, and I’d send my kids there in a heartbeat. In fact, it was my Sidwell drama teacher who pushed me into show business.”
Ana, whom we all remember as the “SNL” Hillary Clinton, says: “She’s such a different figure now than when I was doing her. In those days, nobody could poke much fun because she wasn’t that celebrated, she was just Bill‘s wife and on the back end of that sex scandal. All you could really do was catch that Midwestern accent which, because she’s lived so many places, falls right between most Middle America dialects. I’d love to play her now.”
The absolutely only time Ana could fit our phone call in was one specific 9 a.m. As living witness to her schedule, I wondered how come she managed to talk to me this particular morning?
“Because the kids are away for the weekend. And I’m actually having a little wonderful alone time with Ferdinand.”
Ferdinand? Who’s Ferdinand?
“Our big gray and black rescue cat from Williamsburg who’s the size of a dog who I got through Petfinder and who was rescued from the streets of Bed-Stuy and who sleeps with my 7-year-old. He’s an indoor cat. He’s psyched to never go far from the food and he’s so happy to have me for himself today.”
JUSTIN Timberlake, who owns 901 Tequila — 901’s the Memphis area code where he was born — was at Vegas’ Labio Club and bought everyone a shot. Of his 901 Tequila . . . Liv Ullmann, making her American stage debut directing Cate Blanchett in “A Streetcar Named Desire” revival, tells W magazine why she’s not on-screen anymore: “I didn’t want to see the shock on people’s faces, thinking, ‘My God!’ ” . . . Everything old is new again: John Wayne galloping through “True Grit”? The Coen brothers will remake it with Jeff Bridges galloping. And “Hancock 2” is coming up with Will Smith, Charlize Theron, Jason Bateman since the original “Hancock” made $624 mil worldwide. And “The Green Hornet” returns with Cameron Diaz, Seth Rogen and Christoph Waltz, that evil Nazi of “Inglourious Basterds” as the villain.
WITH Afghanistan, Iraq, Russia, Is rael, Khadafy, the economy, the unemployment, the health issue, the NY governor issue, the White House can at least win the sock war. May Obama know that TV means knee socks not ankle socks. Unless you’re Megan Fox, you don’t flash leg . . . Spike Lee and R. De Niro teaming for “Alphaville,” a drama series set in our gritty Alphabet City of the ’80s . . . Emmy winner Kristin Chenoweth: “I’ll tell you how I made it. I learned from people like Julie Andrews and Bette Midler and from watching those old pros Joel Grey, Carole Shelley, Carol Burnett and Madeline Kahn, in whose honor my dog Maddie was named.” . . . I’m told Jessica Simpson is taking the Tony Romo breakup hard. Depressed, staying home, not having fun, not eating — which I guess is the only good thing.
DR. Thomas Stanley is out with the book “Stop Acting Rich . . . And Start Living Like a Real Millionaire.” His survey shows rich people’s No. 1 car is no Mercedes or Lexus. It’s Toyota. Their favorite watch? Rolex? Omega? Tag Heuer? No. Seiko. Average millionaire’s barber charges $16 for a haircut. The majority never owned a yacht or second home. Four in 10 blow $10 for their bottle of wine. The preferred shoes for lady millionaires — Nine West. Favorite clothing store? Ready? Ann Taylor. America’s biggest spenders are the little people going for brand names to act rich. This doc is a Ph.D., so must be he knows something.
LAWYER Chris Seeger reports a sign at Dan’s Chelsea guitar shop: “Bernie Madoff Fire Sale — No Reasonable Offer Refused.”
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.