The new “Ain’t Them Bodies Saints” stars Rooney Mara. Not a usual title. She’s also no usual movie queen.
This time the usual bodies invited free to a showing even included the once-upon-a-time Lee Radziwill. Even a female with shortshort shorts, highhigh heels, chewing gum. Even a male with a foot-long gray beard.
“She’s the face of Calvin Klein’s fragrance. Tonight’s sponsor’s Calvin Klein. She’s wearing Calvin Klein,” whispered movie encyclopedia Haleigh Breest.
Rooney: “This movie’s about an outlaw escaping prison and running through Texas to find his wife and baby. I play Ruth Guthrie. She’s an ex-outlaw mother.”
Unusual Rooney, the width of an eyebrow, had dead plain black two-piece dress bisected by a center white midriff. Hair dead plain sleek black bisected by a center white part. No beads, embroidery, frippery, nada. Does she eat?
“Of course I eat, I eat a lot. I love to eat. But I’m a vegan. I eat all the time. I even eat bread — especially if it’s good and if I get it free.”
What’s the tricks for that knockout face that decorated Vogue’s cover?
It laughed, then: “I don’t examine myself that closely. Happy it looks good, but if it didn’t I’m not going to admit that to you. Why would I tell you my flaws if you don’t see them yourself?”
Knee-length, no miniskirt. High neck, no bosom in your soup. Hair, no lacquered teased highlights. Bracelets? Necklace? Forget it. Rooney Mara. Magnificent.
Casting talk for a spell
The first humans movie directors call aren’t stars but, usually, the casting director. Since the Actors Studio’s Paul Newman, Shelley Winters, Marilyn Monroe days, I know Ellen Chenoweth, who does the Coen Brothers movies.
She’s now been casting their “Inside Llewyn Davis,” about folk music scene’s early era. Fictional characters but dealing with singers, songwriters trying to make it in the ’60s — like Bob Dylan, Peter, Paul and Mary.
“It starts with sending breakdowns to the agents. The process takes a good three months. When I cast ‘True Grit,’ I had to add more months.
“For this movie, we looked at names like Justin Timberlake, who can sing, great musician Oscar Isaac and Carey Mulligan, whose agent sent me her singing ‘New York, New York’ for an audition scene taping. And there are parts for a John Goodman, an F. Murray Abraham.
“There are lots of fabulous singers. We didn’t want to dub the voice so we started from scratch with many auditions.”
Doesn’t all go smoothly. For “The Raven,” Jeremy Renner was to be Edgar Allen Poe. He dropped out for “Mission: Impossible.” Ewan McGregor was then on. He also opted out. Next came John Cusack.
Johnny Depp, on for “Oz: The Great and Powerful,” got so great and powerful that he, too, went south, and the lead was James Franco.
Hunk has book
Nick Offerman, NBC’s “Parks and Recreation” star, People’s 2012 Sexiest Man Alive, Megan Mullally’s husband, has a humor memoir in October.
“I’m your average corn-fed male with a propensity for smart-assery,” he smart-assedly says. “Grew up in Minooka, Ill. . . . spent time using intoxicants, chasing girls, screwing around, learned the word ‘nonconformist’ in fourth grade and announced I’d be one.”
He’s got that moustache, grills red meat, runs his own workshop, shares a haiku about bratwurst and calls his book “Paddle Your Own Canoe.”
Joke’s on him
Reader Roseanne Mauriello on Weiner throwing his hat and raincoat in the ring: “His Twitter account was hacked? It’s his other thing should’ve been hacked. Running for mayor, let’s hope he only puts his best foot forward.”
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.