Celebrity News

Ricky puts home viewers first

Ricky Gervais. I love him. The man’s deserving of his tongue and tonsils pulled out by their roots, true. But nobody’s funnier. Less careful. In days of yore — BC — before (Political) Correctness — we could laugh at ourselves. Make harmless sport of one another. Now if someone’s short, he’s height challenged. And what we are is humor challenged. Filth, four-letter words seem fine. Just don’t dare say a guy’s short. What he is, is inches diminished.

Just before the Golden Globes I asked had Ricky written all the gags already.

“Yes, but I’m still writing every time a new presenter’s confirmed. I’ll also embellish and ad-lib on the night, depending on what happens and my mood and whether I’m drunk or not.

“I always have a beer in my hand and one already in my belly. But the one when it’s all over is the best . . . Aaah, then I relax.

“When I first hosted, my feeling is they were taken aback when I made actual jokes opposed to introducing people with flattery. And stroking their egos. They know now what to expect. I made a decision whether to pander to the 200 in the room or the 200 million watching at home. I chose the latter and always will.

“If it’s just the rich and famous getting celebrated, it’s boring. I’m trying to make awards shows a spectator sport. Not just an industry ‘love-in.’ ”

And what was his longtime live-in lady Jane wearing?

“How the hell do I know? Who am I, Ryan Seacrest, for God’s sake? Wait, I’ll ask her.” He asked, then: “A black Alexander McQueen dress.”

And are there no nerves on a Golden Globe night?

“Look, the ratings were highest in my year. And I was excited to disprove suggestions I’d never be allowed back. So it was, ‘Yes, I’ll do it . . . see?’

“But I’m not nervous because it won’t upset my career. It isn’t what I do. Can’t affect me because next day I’m writing another stand-up show or a new series. This is not exactly bravery.”

KATE Winslet to play a post WWII magazine columnist in Kenneth Branagh’s “The Guernsey Literary and Potato Peel Pie Society.” In ’96, she was Ophelia to his Hamlet . . . Samuel L. Jackson and Angela Bassett’s “The Mountaintop” caricatures unveiled at Sardi’s . . . The 19th Lola Astanova, some Russian piano virtuoso (virtuosa?) plinks “A Tribute to Horowitz” at Carnegie. She’ll plink wearing Tiffany jewels. Maybe Cartier goes with Rachmaninoff.

BILL O’Reilly exec-producing a two-hour doc on his best seller “Killing Lincoln: The Shocking Assassination That Changed America Forever.” Directors, Ridley Scott and brother Tony, who created “The Good Wife.” National Geographic Channel premieres it next spring.

MORE. All NYC’s big-time money men, the heavy lifters, support Romney. Today is John Catsimatidis’ “Help Save America” fund-raiser. His invite reads:

“Dear Friend . . . We need CHANGE in Washington. The future of our country depends on us THIS November. We cannot take four more years of what we have. My opinion . . . Romney is the only one that can achieve 51 percent. Other candidates can only achieve 47 percent at most. AMERICA LOSES IF OBAMA WINS. Come Tuesday. Invest in America.”

MORE. So all these top guys consider Romney brilliant? No. To quote one: “It’s anybody we think can beat Obama.”

MORE. Deductions from loopholes, tithing to the Church reminding people of his Mormonism, huge income reminding people of his wealth create problems for Romney. Opponents demand he release his returns. He’s not, but can’t keep saying no day after day.

Troublesome in the general election will be his personal tax returns. He must release them at some point but is stalling until he gets the nomination. Finance guys mutter he maybe paid at only a 15 percent rate, which will give Obama ammunition to stir up the middle and lower classes.

SUSAN Sarandon examining the Guggenheim’s Maurizio Cattelan exhibit, which hangs haphazardly from the rotunda . . . Laura Linney at Flex Mussels restaurant . . . Hugh Jackman left the stage to hug dad, in from Australia, then back to the limelight to dedicate a song to him.

DEBRA Messing and Christian Borle filmed a scene for Spielberg’s “Smash” with Cafe Un Deux Trois’ waitstaff. Lunching there at the time, Keith Richards’ wife, Patti Hansen, with daughters and grandparents.

FREEPORT, Long Island, supermarket sign: “Feed your family, not the meter. Plenty of free parking in our parking lot.”

Only in New York, kids, only in New York.