Bill Murray is a great dancer, Brad Pitt is the best-smelling man on earth — and even Anne Hathaway is nice.
So says Jennifer Lawrence’s non-famous best friend — who served as her date to the Oscars, where she broke the star’s fall on the red carpet and battled pushy photographers.
In a funny tell-all essay, Laura Simpson describes the moment Lawrence tripped (again) and used her hairdo as a handrail.
“We finally arrive at the red carpet and as we exit the car, my date eats s–t and uses my freshly done Lauren Conrad up-do to break her fall,” Simpson wrote in the essay, which she posted on Myspace.com Tuesday.
“The crowd goes wild. There are flashbulbs and people circling, yet no one asks if I need any help because unless you are famous at the Oscars, you are completely invisible,” she dished. Eventually, someone did acknowledge her.
“You in the huge dress, get out of the f–king shot!” a photographer barked.
“The only time anyone talks to you is if you are in the way of his or her photo. It’s incredible. It is no wonder actors are crazy,” Simpson wrote.
Once inside, she was thrilled to rub elbows with Jessica Biel, Angelina Jolie and Margot Robbie — who sports a “Kardashian-sized” diamond ring and says, “I feel like a guy with a gun should be following me — I could be halfway to Mexico with this by now.”
Mostly, Simpson can’t stop sniffing Mr. Jolie. “Brad Pitt smells amazing, like nothing I’ve ever smelled. Eventually we ask what cologne he’s wearing and he tells us, ‘I don’t wear cologne. It’s just my musk, I guess.’ ”
Simpson then followed around Bill Murray. “At one point he looks in my direction and winks at me while dancing to ‘If You Want My Body and You Think I’m Sexy’ by Rod Stewart — a moment, I now realize, my whole life had been leading up to.”
Simpson, an aspiring model, met Lawrence seven years ago, bonding over “a mutual respect for Chandler Bing.”