Henry Winkler, “The Fonz” from TV’s 21-inch days, opens in “The Performers” next month. Previews begin next week.
“This show came about back when I was shooting ‘Royal Pains’ for USA. Suddenly a producer asked would I read a play out loud. I said OK. A year and a half ago I read it with Cheyenne Jackson.
“The writer and director could be my sons. Also understand, I can’t read cold. I’m so dyslexic that I’m accused of rewriting Shakespeare.
“The condition was diagnosed when I was 31. Dyslexia’s hereditary. My kids have some of it. You don’t overcome this, you make it your friend. The elbow out the window when I’m driving I know is my left. I still can’t spell.
“This play is a romantic comedy. Two young couples connect at the Adult Film Awards in Las Vegas. They get emotional. They get lost. Things go wrong, and I step in. It’s sex, love and Barry Manilow.
“Anyway, we read. Go figure this would go well. They called again. Would we do that a second time. They added a young lady named Ari Graynor. Next they asked are we available to open November at the Longacre. I guess you should be careful what you wish for. When this came about I went to temple and said ‘Thank you’ 17 times.
“I don’t live here, so I’m in a hotel. Better than renting an apartment. In a hotel, at least they make my bed. And although I’ve brought enough clothes to last through next spring, I haven’t unpacked yet. I won’t unpack until I see the reviews.”
ALEX Rodriguez? Who’s hitting only on an all-female game? Spare the A-Rod and spoil the team, I always say.
TOM Felton, a k a Draci Malfoy, Harry Potter’s nemesis, and 15 Brit buddies at the Ainsworth in Chelsea . . . Fyvush Finkel, who entered the Yiddish Theater at age 9, had his 90th birthday at Sutton Place Synagogue. Forget cream-puff birthday cake. Think corned beef sandwiches . . . Shackled, in a courtroom, Bernie Kerik was allowed zero freedom with wife or family. One two-minute phone call only. They read about it, knew nothing in advance.
SINCE Santa was a pup Neiman Marcus has hustled its wow-ee Christmas stuff. The 2012 catalogue offers Van Cleef & Arpels his ’n’ hers diamond watches. Too chintzy to spring for a million bucks and change? How about a mini hen farm. How mini, I don’t know. Maybe two chicks and an egg. Also a private dinner for 10 cooked by a famous chef. Only $250,000. The Bromo’s extra.
A Pinel & Pinel Arcade PS Trunk. It’s $90,000, 51 colors of calfskin softer than a calf’s behind — or even yours. Has every high-octane whatsis, such as 24 PlayStation games, Bluetooth, Blu-ray discs, blue whatever, motion-detection camera, wireless music, mikes, 1,800-watt system and probably someone humming “A Partridge in a Pear Tree.” What you’ll do with this thing is your problem.
Unless you worry a dog will upstage you, a cheapo 30 grand gets you a walk-on in Broadway’s new revival “Annie.” Another choice? For 150 thou there’s a Bulleit Frontier Whiskey Woody-tailgating party trailer made from handcrafted bourbon flasks by whoever’s Moore & Giles. Abbott & Costello, I know. Beyoncé and Jay-Z, I know. Charlie Rose and Gayle King, I know I know. But Moore & Giles?? The good news is their doohickey comes with a year’s supply of hooch.
If money’s tight, try the $99,500 part sci-fi, part secret service-ish, all adrenaline jet-pack flight like in the flick “Thunderball.” Strap in, pull throttle and up, up and away. Coming down, I don’t know. That’s probably another gift idea.
There’s more, but if you’re a type who’s scrounging for a lousy Orlon scarf, forget it.
JUST out of Harvard, just out of the Knicks, just become a Houston Rocket, Jeremy Lin gets GQ’s November cover and says race plays into basketball: “There’s perceptions and stereotypes of Asian-Americans. For me that makes it even crazier, more unexpected. I have to play well for a longer period of time for certain people to believe it, because I’m Asian. That’s the reality.
“I’m trying to find a balance. I’m not like the next Michael Jordan, but I’m also not what everyone saw me as before I started playing in the NBA. There’s so many uncertainties. I don’t know how my next season’s going to turn out. Things I struggled with last year I’ll struggle with this year. There’s that learning process . . . I have to get better.”
WHILST awaiting this interminable presidential election, here’s a novel way to pass the time: Bend over a fish tank, shake the head free of dandruff and watch guppies go into a feeding frenzy.
SIGN in a West 44th barber shop: “Haircuts and shaves given without unnecessary conversation.”
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.