People come to New York, they get excited. Brad Pitt came to New York, New York went nuts.
To shill “World War Z,” which is about toppling governments, armies and people, Paramount Pictures cranked out a world war of bodies. Fewer human beings crammed Broadway’s 47th & Seventh triangle on V-J Day. Thousands, with pens, papers, cameras, cells, screamed behind barriers, cops, NYPD cordons, black-dressed security types, chained platforms, frozen areas.
Jumbotrons played zombies and apocalyptic horror scenes from the pandemic, undead “World War Z.” A band rocked. A Brit blared on a mike. All for one guy in black glasses, black shirt, black silk suit, pants puddling into black suede boots.
Brad’s former short curly dark hair? Nearly longer than Angelina’s and blonder than Gwyneth’s. Once Elizabeth and Richard were the golden couple. Today, Angelina and Brad. And he was easy. Posed. Laughed. Joked. Signed autographs.
Laughing, Brad said to me: “I remember my first audition, very first screen test I ever took. Back in the ’80s for ‘The Accused’ with Jodie Foster. I was excited, nervous. Afterward, when I got home, I asked the usual question, like you always do, ‘Well, how did you think I did?’ Being polite, they said, ‘You’ll be fine after a while. Right now you just need to get some dramatic training’ . . . and I’d already been in drama class for a year.”
And what would he do if, à la this movie, the world was in its last day?
“Would I do something heroic? Who knows? I think if I knew this was absolutely it, the final end of Earth, I’d probably just have a big party.
“Look, the fact is I’ve worked on this film, this one project, forever. Involved in every step for at least five-six years. It’s been so long, I can’t remember. I’m one of the producing partners. You know how often I’ve seen the whole thing? Maybe 40 times. I’ve been through every bit of the entire production. I’m in the editing room.
“And despite all my heroic fight scenes, I still managed to eat everything and get some sleep. I admit, however, I did twist a couple of ankles.”
We talked below the stairs that co-starlets in short short fluffed, poufed skirts were mounting. Weather, hot. Underwear, light. Not necessarily pantyhose, hose or panties. Standing beneath, a OB-GYN MD could’ve conducted free exams.
Nice friendly Brad Pitt: “Anything else I can do for you?” Even before I watched his thrilling film, looking straight up I answered: “No, thanks. I’ve about seen all I need to.”
What they are saying
Bernadette Peters to another cat lover: “Yours must be neutered. Not all females have babies. I never did, and I’m fine with that.”. . . Big-time photographer Peter Beard, schlepping a Canon Power Shot 15 camera: “I don’t like this camera. It has a mind of its own.”. . . Minus one of his own brand-new shoot/kill/beat/stab/kill/ movies Bruce Willis, white stubble face, on 57th between B’way and Eighth, buying Time Out.
Mum’s word
So Kris Jenner Kardashian, grandma to Kanye West’s new daughter, told her family: “Pay no attention to bullies. Only look at media you can trust. Don’t read the crap.” Watch this sharp manager’s tender words show up on a line of Mother’s Day greeting cards.
Watching TV lately
So Tv. Last week CBS’s highly linguistic Scott Pelley, staring at a 6-foot penguin, asks: “Is he as tall as me?”
And, since MSNBC’s “Morning Joe” yesterday said mankind should read my column, thanks for the shout-out.
So this big-time longtime, no-time-to-rest businessman, in need of rest, hits JFK. At a counter he says: “Give me a ticket.” The attendant replies: “Where to?” He says: “When’s the next plane?” Told, “In two hours.” He says, “Where’s it going?” They reply, “Stockholm.” His answer, “Fine. Get me a ticket.” And up up and awayyyy he goes . . .
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.